Yeah, times are tough, I tell ya. They're sooo bad that
I got a pre-declined for a credit card in the mail
I bought a toaster and my free gift with purchase was a bank
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America
Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates
Yeah, times are so bad that I called the Suicide Hotline, and got transferred to a call center in Pakistan. When I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
I'll be here all week.